19 great things I did for my self – some of them rough, some of them fun

Doing great things for yourself is a way to show selflove the healthy way and send signals to your subconscious that you are worth prioritizing.

But what to do? If you grew up with abuse or neglect, you might not know yourself so well. It might be hard to tell what would make you happy or give you peace.

Therefore it’s great that we can mirror ourselves in others and be inspired by them. I have been inspired by hundreds of people – once I realized how much easier my hero’s journey became when I chose to let me get inspired by others and follow in their lead instead of inventing everything from scratch. I could pick and choose from what they did – if it felt right I would copy and if what ever it was I copied felt good, I would take note of it for later use.

Here are some of the things I have done that made me happy og gave me peace. Take what you want and leave the rest. And please tell me below what YOU do when doing nice things for you – or how this list inspired you!

Thanks for being here!

  1. Instead of just picking any coffee at the supermarket, I went and spend a year drinking all sorts of coffee brewed in all kinds of ways, so I’d find my favorite. That means, that today when I drink my morning coffee, it’s not just coffee. It’s almost a sacred ritual because I know that I put a lot of effort into it – because I am worth the effort.
    Cafetiere with medium roasted organic colombian from a small local company and a teaspoon of maple sirup and a hint of hazelnutmilk and I am in heaven.
  2. Realized that I hate cleaning and hired a cleaner when I was 30 – so I have not done any cleaning for 20 years. Thank you, me!
  3. Took acting class even though I do not want to be an actor as my parents. It took some of the stigma off of being an actors child and it was a really skilled and kind instructor. We had some great laughs and I learned a lot that can be used in all areas of life.
  4. I dreamed of being a musician. I ain’t. I played guitar, piano, flute and dulcimer and none of it could compete with my impatience. But then someone said that I have a nice singing voice and after a little struggling I decided that my voice is my instrument and I sing whenever given the chance. I might treat myself to singing lessons when I turn 60! =P
  5. Travel to the mountains in Spain or other places often. Looking at the mountains makes me feel at home. Denmark – where I was born – is mostly flat, so I have to go to other countries to see mountains. I don’t need an excuse. Whenever I can, I go, hike into the mountains and sit there for hours, listening to the birds, feeling at ease.
  6. Got a latex pillow. Too expensive. I hate latex, but all over the internet it says that this kind of pillow is the best. I tried it once and never looked back.
  7. Stopped eating dairy, sugar and gluten. I had no idea that all those little ailments, allergies and tiredness was caused by these things. But it was a miracle. Today, 95% of my food is unprocessed and consists of veggies, lentils, beans, fruit, nuts, berries and seeds. No, I am not “Raw” and I am not vegan. Just healthy, happy and full of energy.
  8. Went no contact with my dad in 2005. He sucked me dry every time we talked, he didn’t re spect my boundaries and I couldn’t handle it (and I shouldn’t), so I drew a line in the sand. I spend 2 years afterwards feeling like a terrible person and the worlds worst daughter, but slowly my wellbeing improved and that convinced me I had done the right thing.
  9. Came clean and told the media about my life with a narcissistic father when he died. That takes guts. Since the N most shows a very funny and caring and charming face to the outside world, I faced a serious shitstorm when I did it. (Because he was a famous entertainer)  But I had people backing me who had also known him up close. So I could shrug it off.
  10. Threw out my old toothpaste and started using coconutoil only. My teeth has never been as strong, white and unproblematic as now. Try it out. (Remember to also ditch sugar entirely)
  11. I throw dinner parties at least 4 times a year, where fun and laughing is the main goal. Most of my friends have become addicted to it as have I.
  12. Stopped struggling. Realized that every time something feels like a struggle, I am on the wrong path. Not worth it. Ever. Just walk away. (I will always fight for what I think is right, fighting for something and struggling are two different things)
  13. Selfpublished my first book in 2009.  It became a bestseller and it still praised for it’s accessibility and ease of use.
  14. Hugging trees. I started in 1985 because a friend persuaded me and I have hugged a lot of trees since then. It’s really nice. Wrap your arms around the tree, put your cheek to the bark and close your eyes and send the tree some kind thoughts. They love it. It takes a while before you can feel the tree hugging you back, so have patience. 😉
  15. At any given chance I dance!
  16. Started reinforcing my boundaries and stopped making excuses when I did it.
  17. Stopped explaining so much. If people really want to understand, they will ask. Have faith in them and stop trying to convince the whole world that you are right or allowed to do, say and be who you are.
  18. Threw a big party for myself when I had sold 50.000 books. (Most books in Denmark sell around 1.500 copies!) In Denmark we don’t celebrate ourselves. That’s sort of not ok.
  19. Learned how to hug other people. In my family we never hugged and I grew up in a community where it was more common to be punched in the face. It was so awkward for the first 6 months, then it became better. Today I am a great hugger and I even hug my clients if they want to be hugged. We shouldn’t be cheap. Hugging is not sex. It’s just 2 people showing respect and affection. More of that.

Can you relate?

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